Saturday, January 29, 2005

Look Who's Talking

Look Who's Talking

Dogs and cats have a language and it can be translated into English. What people fail to realize though is that their vocabulary is extremely limited because their thoughts are limited. Their thoughts are governed by their needs and for a species, your instincts determine your needs.

When you hear your pet talking, he is not saying "How are you feeling? Did you see the Sox game last night? I certainly could go for some pancakes." Pet speech is more like: "I'm hungry, I'm hungry. I'm hungry. I should eat. I should eat. I should eat. What was that noise?! Oh well I'm hungry, I should eat. Eat, yes eat. Pet me. Pet me. Pet me. I want out, pet me. Pet me outside. Feed me outside. Pet me while you're feeding me outside. There's that noise again! Let me in. Let me out. Let me in. Let me out. I'm going upstairs. I'm going downstairs. I'm going to take a piss. I'm going to take a crap. How can I get up there? Someone help me get up there. I need to get up there. Oh Lord won't someone help me get up there? Something fantastic is up there and I need to see it/catch it/kill it/eat it. Ok, I need to get down now."

Still on baby watch. I will have a daughter no later than Tuesday.